Just the usual

I am unmotivated these days. I have the desire to write or to study, but not the follow through. I know I should be more on top of things.

I'm overwhelmed. We moved 40 miles away from my job this summer. It's a hassel to get up and around every morning and I take the kids with me. I'm a teacher and I'm pulling rank and putting my kids in school where I work. I think my life would be easier if they went to the district we lived in, but I probably would see less of them.

My oldest, Isaiah, decided he wanted to be an involved student this year. All through middle school he didn't show a bit of interest in joining clubs or trying sports, not he does band, which meets at seven in the morning every other day, and cross country, which runs until six at night most nights. He is enjoying it and I think its good for him. He isn't the best academic student, but I stay on top of his grades and I think I'm going to check out a set of textbooks to keep at home so he can't pull this, "I forgot all my stuff" crap when I tell him he needs to be doing some homework in the evenings. He turns fifteen Saturday. Where did the time go?

I've been trying to complete my last class for my master's degree. I think my brain is deflating or something because it isn't going well. I have to do a practicum for elementary special education. I don't have anything in particular against elementary, but I like high school. Its almost two hours a day away from my own work site and students and planning. I feel torn. And the lady I'm observing is a great teacher, but I feel like she didn't understand what I needed when she agreed to do this and is now feeling put out.

My caseload at work dropped, so every new kid that comes into the building is mine for a while. I like kids, but I HATE the meetings. This year, between some interesting characters in the district, and my practicum, scheduling is a nightmare. I break out in hives at least once a week.

I am loving being on the farm though. It's a tiny farm compared to most around here, ten acres, but my chickens are giving me eggs and we have a milk cow. She's pregnant now, so not actively milking yet. Life is actually pretty good. Just so much going on. I need to learn how to really relax and let it go when its time to let it go. That's new for me. I've spent years being so single mindedly focused on getting to where I wanted to be, I don't know how to slow down a little bit, but not too much, and enjoy it.