I don't know why, but it seems like lately, I laven't felt that over whelming urge to purge here like I used to.
I wonder if its because I am in such a better place, emotionally, then I was when I started blogging, sending these mostly anomouse messages into cyber space.
Anyway, in the last week I've finished the visit with dad, got up early saturday and drove home, the kids stayed. I left before they woke up because other wise it would be hard on me . . . and I wanted to get home while it was still daylight without killing myself. I succeeded.
Having spent so much time driving the previous day, sunday I decided to walk to the grocery store, and ended up giving myself horrible blisters on the bottom of my feet, which are still sore after several days of badaids and antibiotic ointment.
My brother Tom is officially homeless and was planning to hitchike to California, I talked him out of it, and somehow he ended up staying with me. Right now it isn't too big a deal becase the kids aren't here and he's sleeping on Isaiah's bed. BUt he can't stay. He talks about going to sell plasma and to panhandling, but I don't think these are viable options. I've threatened to take him to dad's and leave him there if he's still homeless and jobless when I go get the kids.
I made a coffee date with a guy, who broke it the day of and has gone silent. NICE. I think I give up. I would like that "got your back" and the compainionship that a relationship gives, but I am convinced that the truly decent guys, don't want anything to do with a woman who has three kids with two dads and all the other issues I have.
And that pretty much brings anyone still reading up to date. I am trying to arrange a bit of a get together witha friend of mine, but I'm not sure if its going to happen either, she is notorious for making plans to make plans and then breaking them also.
So, if nothing else, I have a few weeks of peace and quiet and can catch up on my reading. YAY me.
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