Have I mentioned that I hate the ex lately?

Well, I still hate him. I try to be cordial and to keep him as distant from my mind as I can. I can't quite manage forgiveness towards him, which as a christian person I should have, but I do manage a sort of non attention. 

He didn't bother to see his kids over christmas, didn't even call to talk to Isaiah. He last saw them right before or right after thanksgiving, that day he had them cooped up in the car all day and then i had to go get them. 

Well, he emailed me today and announced that on FEB 6-8 he would be able to take them. That he had a room with toys and bunk beds all set up for them and he couldn't wait to see them. And that I had to drive them to Miami Oklahoma to take them to him and again to pick them up. After putting in a full week I am supposed to spend most of the week end in my car burning gas. Isn't he the one who moved so far away? Isn't he the one constantly shaking up with women he's sweet talked? 

I told him I wouldn't do it, He could come get them from the house on Friday or wait to get them until saturday, which wouldn't make any sense when they would be coming back home sunday. 

He writes back damanding all sorts of "respect". I'm sorry, people earn respect. He hasn't even earned it from his son, who noted the other day that "dad keeps moving further away from me". 

I am so tempted to tell the guy to take a hike and not return. So so tempted. He threatens to take me court every now and then. I'm not sure what he thinks that will get him. He's proven that living close to the kids isn't a priority. He's proven he can't hold down a job or an apartment without being someone's (usually a woman) roommate. He's proven that he won't keep his child support current unless they threaten him with jail. I can't imagine a judge would do much but tell him, tough luck, and probably order a more reasonable amount of child support. 

I really wish that I didn't have some weird radiation that keeps kind sane people away and attracts damaged assholes. Maybe its because at heart I am a damaged asshole and I am only kidding myself that I'm anything else.